Friday, 22 February 2013

Main line and Sidings

Yesterday ended much better than it began. I had quite a bad headache until early afternoon, and then Charlotte took me to ASDA and I perked up.

Strange you ask - yes I agree - ASDA isn't my favourite store at all, and it is half term, and was packed, but the trip did cheer me up and made me feel better.

What motivated me to visit ASDA was the fact that last August I took out a life policy with them, for the over 50s with no health questions asked. ASDA actually use Liverpool Victoria Friendly Assurance, and they, unlike the others, pay up if death occurs after a year (others are 2 years) so I thought it would help out when it is needed. For doing it, they gave me a £30 ASDA gift voucher, and yesterday I was keen to use it. Sadly I found nothing to take my fancy, so it went on some food Sue had asked me to get. I shall probably spend the £30 at Hemswell next Monday - pottery or silver - or wherever we go as we may have to change our plans as there is now a chance Kathryn will be with us, which is great news, when before we thought that it would just be Mark and I.

Just thinking about my time in hospital for a moment, I got very impatient when I was back on the ward, and today I am feeling impatient and frustrated at not being able to do more.

Soon after the operation I wanted to walk, I wanted the pain to go away, I wanted to drive, I wanted to do all sorts of things that i had done before. And I wanted to do them "NOW"!! But that was not to be the case.

Indeed after four months I still can't walk very well, my mobility is limited, and at times I am in some pain.

After a life of being in control, and doing things when I wanted to do them, usually immediately, I have found this very difficult at times, especially over the past four months when I have had to learn to pace myself.

This has not been, and is still not an easy lesson for me. What I have learnt, is to appreciate "the present moment" and not always looking forward to the next job or experience!And I have had some wonderful moments which on the past would have been totally missed.

I have often preached in the past on the subject of "the sacrament of the present moment", now I must once again learn to practice what I preach!

I do drive a little, but not a lot, yet. I enjoy going to pick Sue up from work in the car, or taking her in the morning, but it really takes it out on me. It isn't a question of just popping in the car and driving it somewhere - it's about the buildup, getting myself motivated and ready, with my limited mobility, and then when I have completed the task experiencing extreme tiredness. But progress is being made.

In hospital I also got the feeling that once the operation had been completed, and things were improving quite well, I was parked up a siding. The excitement had gone, the focus switched to others, (rightly so may I add) and I was beginning to feel overlooked. Now I know that is not the case, it is just that is how it felt.

At one stage I was removed from the spinal unit to another ward in the trauma department which was made up of mainly young men who had been involved in road traffic accidents or football accidents.

They weren't as chatty and didn't appreciate my jokes and humour. They came and went in a matter of 48 hours having had the operation and being discharged. It was great meeting some different types of people, but it really did frustrate me as there was no possibility of me being discharged at that time.

After a while I was transferred back to the ward I had been on in the Spinal Unit and where I was affectionately known, still, as Father Ted.

Whilst in hospital I loved having visitors, and thank you all who came, it was so much appreciated. Sue and Charlotte came between them every night and I was so grateful especially because it is a round trip of almost 50 miles.

Visitors came from almost all over the country to see me, from all of my experiences over my whole life, and that pleased me very much as well.

Got a restful day today - a priest friend from Manchester was coming to see me, but sadly he is not well, so we have rearranged for when the weather is better.

Have a great weekend, and we'll chat again tomorrow!

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